Gliding
How do you continue to move forward when the pain won’t go away? How do you respond when the pain is yelling at you, making its presence known? Pulsating. Throbbing. How do you continue to live each day with joy, knowing you will go to sleep in pain and wake up in pain? Tossing and turning through the night.
Due to my physical appearance, most folks do not know I’m experiencing constant pain. Even those closest to me, forget at times. This is my experience everyday and has been since I was hit by a car in 2019 two days after the New Year (three days after my 28th birthday). This intense occurrence happened to leave with me the blessing of a scraped knee and tender shoulder on the right side of my body. Initially. As the weeks progressed my neck began to throb, then my wrist.
When I was hit, I did not use the health insurance my school was paying for because I was on my way to view an apartment that I couldn’t afford. I was so desperate to move out of my friends place, I ran into the street trying to catch the bus... The way we run into ourselves, trying to run from ourselves. It’s been a journey of doctor visits, X-rays and physical therapy and still the pain persists. Lesser with each day and still present.
I’ve allowed my pain to ground me in this body. Adapting my physical practice to accommodate its needs. Rest is not an option but a necessity. My pain has liberated me from the bondage I once experienced working in a physical location that was structurally uncomfortable for me.
No more running! Slow down! I glide…
How are you gliding? How do you acknowledge the chronic pain of your experience? How are you allowing it to bring you deeper into yourself?